Tech neck: what are smartphones doing to our bodies?

Name: Tech neck.

Age: Two years old.

Appearance: The next stage of human evolution.

This sounds exciting! Are we all going to be cyborgs soon? Not exactly.

That sounds just like me. Me too. And guess what? All that bad news was a pain in the neck.

OK, fine, two ways. Or three, if you factor in the claim that the blue light emitted by phones can interfere with melatonin production. Or four, if you count the eye strain you get from prolonged use. And a couple of years ago it was suggested that humans are growing bone spurs at the base of their skulls to counter all the terrible phone-related posture.

Please, stop! Do you want to know the good news?

Yes! Anything! The posture problem is easy to correct. You can do a simple stretch, where you interlock your fingers behind your head and hold your elbows against a wall.

This is good. I can do this. Then again, there is a better way to combat tech neck.

This sounds ominous. You could always try not using your phone as much.

Never! The humps are worth it! Suit yourself.