Australians have unequal rights to die. For some families, that only adds to the pain

All of this means that the rules on voluntary assisted dying are not uniform across Australia. It leaves some terminally ill people in one state or territory unable to choose to end their lives, while those on the other side of the border can. And it leaves a few, like French, stuck between family on one side, and the death they want on the other.

Independent member for Sydney Alex Greenwich knows a bit about the cost of delaying this kind of legislation, having co-sponsored failed bills in the past.

When French received her diagnosis last year, it was via Zoom. The city was about to enter hard lockdown again, and Walton began the task of coordinating with two state governments to get over the border to help nurse her daughter and take care of their newborn grandson, Jameson, the baby French had spent 10 years trying to conceive. It was the start of a dawning realisation of just how diabolical navigating the sometimes vastly different bureaucracies of neighbouring states could be.

In an April 2021 Australia Institute poll, three-quarters of Australians agreed with the principle that a person who is experiencing suffering that cannot be relieved and who asks to die should be allowed to receive the assistance of a doctor to do so. Another July 2021 Australian Institute poll found that seven in 10 NSW voters think that voluntary assisted dying should be legal.

In all the states that have thus far legalised it, VAD is only available to adults with decision-making capacity in the end stages of a terminal illness, and who are suffering intolerably. The person must maintain decision-making capacity throughout the process and make repeated requests for VAD. They can withdraw at any time. Amid caring for her newborn and dealing with increasingly painful symptoms, French applied for access to VAD in August. It was approved by February. By then, French had well outlived her three month prognosis. And even then, Walton says she was reluctant to actually order the medication to be delivered to her house.

And for their families, that means trying to make peace with the way they died.